Out Now – 8th December 2011

New Year’s Eve
It’s amazing that a film with a cast consisting of at least 18 actors, many of which could almost be described as A-listers, includes not a single one at the top of their game right now. Instead we have a mix of TV actors trying to break out and former film stars struggling to remain relevant. Following on in a similar vein to the mind-numbing Valentine’s Day, this film follows a myriad of couples on New Year’s Eve. Tedious links will join the couples and in a similar way the audience will be united in an overwhelming sense of rage towards the film they are watching. A great date movie if you happen to be dating the criminally bland.

Predators – Review

Adrien Brody certainly takes on a good range of films. This year we’ve had a hopeless romantic in Brothers Bloom, a fieldmouse in Fantastic Mr. Fox and are soon to have a mad scientist in Splice. For Predators Brody unveils a new character as he becomes the gravelly voiced and big armed action hero. And he pulls it off too!

Without Brody Predators would just be a bad action/sci-fi/thriller but he manages to bring it up to a mediocre action/sci-fi/thriller. As a result the film was pretty enjoyable though did had surprisingly long sections where nothing particularly happened, I suppose these were to create “tension” but it didn’t really work.

None of the characters were particularly memorable and they were all completely unlikable. Topher Grace in particular managed to come across as a creep as he pretty much reprised his character from Spiderman 3. Grace’s best performance on the big screen remains in his small part in Valentines Day.

Having not seen any other films in this franchise (I know, I know) I can’t really compare it to the other but from the sounds of the first this contains slightly more of the actual Predators while retaining the jungle setting.

One thing I’ll say for the film is it doesn’t beat around the bush at the start… well technically the characters do… anyway the action starts right off with everyone falling from the sky.

In summary, it wasn’t very good but wasn’t painful to watch.

Valentines Day – Review

Thanks to a complete misreading of the listings I wound up seeing Valentines Day last night and let’s just say I took the bullet for you. You don’t really need me to tell you that this was not a good film; it is obviously a film designed for a certain date, flimsily plotted with short barely connected stories and sprinkled with a few well known faces.

The rest of the audience seemed to be really enjoying themselves, I will even confess to laughing more than once and it was nice to see a brief cameo from Kristen Schaal, but the movie was for the most part completely pointless. At least one of the storylines didn’t even remotely progress and those that did either consisted of a pairing breaking up, getting together or both.

Most of the acting was good enough if not exactly stellar; it’s not as if the script was helping them out at all. However the two performances that rose above mediocrity into awfulness were those by Eric Dane and Taylor Swift. While Swift clearly had too much energy and was almost spilling out of the screen, Dane appeared as bored as me and made no effort to act at all.

If any of those involved were to do well out of this film it is Anne Hathaway and Topher Grace whose short plot was  as amusing and touching as Valentines Day had to offer. If their story were a short film I might recommend you watch it but as it’s entangled with the rest of this mess of a film I say steer clear.