Top 10 Films of 2012

It’s finally here! Welcome to my obligatory annual blogger’s list in which I try to rank incomparable films that share one thing in common – a 2012 UK release date. I tried to limit myself to just 10 films this year after finding 20 a bit too many in 2011. I managed to whittle my list down to 10, then added two I felt I just couldn’t leave out. It’s my top 10, I can have 12 if I want to.

Holy Motors starts the list in a cautious manner. I slept through a lot of the film and confessed as much in my review. Watching a famously mind-boggling film in French while half asleep was a terrifying experience. I could barely read the subtitles and would often wake up to find the lead actor was playing a different character to when I was last conscious.

The film follows a mysterious man as he travels between appointments in a stretch limo. What appointments are these? I couldn’t even begin to explain. Suffice to say that each time the limo stops a different character step out to play a minor or major role in someone elses lives. The end is so bizarre I thought I had actually dreamt it. One of the Jo(h)ns I saw the film with has tirelessly defended it over the past three months and I couldn’t not include it in my extended top 10. In Jon’s own words:

“It came out of nowhere, it was beautiful, strange, intriguing and was utterly compelling even though I don’t think I really understood it. Just like a girl I used to fancy.”

No other film on this list includes two erect penises.

How could I not? This film about a retirement home in India catering only to British actors of the finest pedigree. It was a film featuring both Dame Judi and Maggie, comprised of a myriad of storylines and was consistently funny and touching for the entirety of its two-hour running film.

Many have said that the success of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is down to its ability to pick up the grey pound. While I admit that this is one of very few films last year that could be said to specifically cater to the older generation I think the appeal expands far beyond the wrinkled amongst us. As I exited the screening at 20th Century Fox in Soho Square (ahem) I instantly texted both my mum and my sister (such is the life of the single blogger) to let them know that their new favourite film was hitting cinemas in a couple of months.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is a warm hug that everyone can enjoy and famously (well, not really) made me want to whisk Judi Dench off to India and retire in a dilapidated hotel.

And now for the proper Top 10:

Out Now – 24th February 2012

Safe House
Ryan Reynolds is a young CIA Agent with a single task, stay with a fugitive in a safe house. Typically unreliable, Reynolds is soon on the run with the fugitive who may well be played by Denzel Washington. For an insight into what it might look like if Judi Dench were in the lead role have a look above and wonder why I have nothing better to do.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
And now for a film which actually contains the goddess that is Judi Dench (along with every other British actor who can safely be called mature). If you like a gentle comedy filled with wrinkles then you’re in luck. Have yet to see a quote from my review used on any posters. Who wouldn’t see this film if they knew it “made me want to whisk Judi Dench off to India and retire in a dilapidated hotel”? Come on Fox Searchlight, sort out your marketing department.

Red Dog
A dog (the Red Dog in question) goes on a walkabout to find its owner and unites a small community in the process. It may sound a little twee but thanks to being an Australian film rather than American, it stands a chance of being funny and, if we let it, a little moving.

One for the Money
Katherine Heigl continues to fail to retire as she takes on the role of bounty hunter in her latest “comedy”. As punishment I have given her Judi Dench’s face, poor Dench.

Blood Car (limited release)
Filmed about five years ago and set “in the near future” this comedy horror, about a time in which human blood becomes the ultimate alternative fuel source, may well be happening RIGHT NOW!!! If you feel anaemic please check that your neighbour isn’t siphoning off your blood to make the school run.

Black Gold (limited release)
“Set in the 1930s Arab states at the dawn of the oil boom, the story centers on a young Arab prince torn between allegiance to his conservative father and modern, liberal father-in-law.” Sand and swords bore me too much to even try to be funny.

Laura (limited release)
The BFI continue their run of re-releasing classic films with a film noir from the 40s about a detective who falls for the woman whose murder he is investigating. Talk about dating anything with a pulse… or without.

Rampart (limited release)
Woody Harrelson is “the last of the renegade cops”, fighting for survival and being all gritty and stuff. Genuinely weird to think that he started off as Woody in Cheers.

Deviation (limited release)
Good God, it stars Danny Dyer. Move along.

Naachle London (limited release)
Thanks mostly to extreme racism I don’t tend to mention Bollywood releases, but this one is set in London so I’m going to mention it. Film mentioned, job done. Now for some humus.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel – Review

In The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel eight British pensioners are tempted away from their native country with the promise of a free flight to India and the chance to live out their retirements in a luxury hotel. On arrival they find the hotel is in disrepair and run by a young man called Sonny (Dev Patel). Over time the group grow to either love or loathe their new home, Sonny battles to keep his vision of an extraordinary retirement home afloat and each senior citizen goes on their own unique journey.

With such a large cast of British acting royalty the film is at risk of feeling fragmented as at least seven separate stories are told, but somehow it works. The various characters are each seeking something different; a lost love, sex, life after the loss of a partner, a new hip, a rich husband or to save their marriage. What links them together, and highlights their differences, is India itself. The country is photographed beautifully and the film is filled with vibrant colours, a myriad of sounds, and various exotic smells. Perhaps the smells were only in my mind. The characters learn to cope with their new surroundings with varying degrees of success, some thriving amongst the new experiences and others shying away from the terrifying world outside the hotel.

The various story threads bring with them a nice mix of humour, drama and even a little romance. The trailer may have sold the film as a slightly faster paced comedy than it is, but The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel still has plenty of laughs spread across its running time. What the film also offers, that perhaps the trailer does not showcase enough, is plenty of heartfelt moments and plots that go a little deeper than most light comedies allow. It doesn’t hurt that every role is filled by a beloved British face, from Judi Dench to Maggie Smith, from Bill Nighy to Tom Wilkinson, and from Penelope Wilton to Celia Imrie. With talent like this given the rare opportunity to strut their stuff in leading roles the two-hour running time flies by and at the end I wanted to check into the Marigold Hotel and stay a little while longer.

With an older cast and a gentler approach to comedy than is normally seen on the big screen, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is not going to excite everyone. I overheard a fellow critic at my screening suggesting that perhaps it would be preferred by an older audience, but speaking as a 23-year-old I recommend this film as proof that you don’t have to be the same age as the cast to find this film funny.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is a gentle comedy with a lot of heart. The visuals were stunning and cast of British legends were wonderful to watch in their element. It was enough to make me want to whisk Judi Dench off to India and retire in a dilapidated hotel.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is on general release on 24th February 2012.

Are You Old Enough for Racism?

Last night I was invited along to a screening of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, a film with a trailer so filled with British ‘National Treasures’ that I nearly fell over myself with excitement. As someone who only falls over themselves once a week, this was no mean feat. I can’t tell you whether I liked the film or not, but I can bore you with something interesting* I noticed over at the BBFC. Just try to stop me.

The BBFC has rated The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel as 12A and in their consumer advice say that the film “contains strong language, moderate sex references and racist remarks.” I was surprised to see racist remarks highlighted as a reason parents may not want their children to see a film, though I’m not sure why as racism is of course vile and reprehensible. I’m not afraid to take a widely supported and uncontroversial stand.

Digging deeper, as only someone with too much time on their hands does, I found over at the Parents BBFC website guidelines for what sort of language the BBFC will allow at 12A:

Discriminatory language may be present but will not be endorsed by the work as a whole. Aggressive use of discriminatory language (for example homophobic or racist terms) is unlikely to be acceptable at ‘12’ or ‘12A’ unless it is clearly condemned.

So there you have it, you can only hear racist slurs which are not clearly condemned when you are at least 15 years old. I suppose the aim is to not expose the nation’s children to endless streams of fully endorsed racism until they are old enough to feel sufficiently outraged. Makes sense to me.

Interesting* also to note that American History X, a film about neo-Nazis and filled with racism so strong it borders on the unwatchable, has no mention of racism in its consumer advice from the BBFC. Hmm.

There you have it, a series of facts strung together into something almost resembling a coherent dialogue. Now if you’ll excuse me I have to go and wrestle with the Oscar Nomination live-stream again.

*Debatable

The Best is Yet to Come: 2012

As much as we are obliged to look back over the year just gone, we are obliged to look ahead at the year just beginning. It’s always exciting to look at the next twelve months and all the exciting treats that are coming to our screens. Below are my personal picks of the films worth seeing in 2012, and I’m hoping there will be many more besides, a few gems I haven’t even heard of yet.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel – Trailer

If there’s one type of actor I love it is an older English actor, the more honours the better. Put a Dame in a cast list and I will be queuing up on opening night. There’s something about an actor with a huge career behind them who continues to produce quality work that I find irresistible… in a cinematic sense of course.

When I heard about The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, a comedy about seven British pensioners having a romp in India, I could hardly believe my eyes. Dames all over the place! Meet me after the trailer:

 

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How much fun does that look? Providing the best jokes aren’t all in this trailer it looks like we have a British comedy starring a plethora of our older stars, showing the young up-and-comers how it’s done. Even more exciting is that this film stars my all time favourite “National Treasure”, or rather an amazing combination of six. With a cast like this I feel the trailer should simply list the cast while rousing music plays, think Burn After Reading.

Sorry Ronald Pickup, I have no idea who you are.

No. If I can’t pronounce it, I don’t want to eat it.