Out Now – 18th November 2011

Nicholas Cage continues to make terrible films with this action thriller in which his wife, played by the ever-bland January Jones, is captured forcing Cage to employ a vigilante group. Why does Guy Pearce keep making such erratic film choices?

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1
OMFG, Bella and Edward totally get married at last!!! I was a die-hard Team Jacob fan but at least this leaves him for the rest of us, right girls?! I hear Bella and Edward have mad crazy whoopie and she gets all pregnant with a demon or something. CANNOT WAIT!! Lolz

American Cheerleader Secrets (limited release)
This American sex comedy was released in the US last year but only on DVD so it is bizarre that it is getting a limited release in Apollo cinemas here in the UK. “A pair of horny college guys get summer jobs at a sexy cheerleader camp.” It’s an 18… what more do you need to know?

How to Stop Being a Loser (limited release)
Be careful who you invite to see this with you. Advertised as the British Hitch, a synopsis the trailer fully supports, this comedy features all the people you’ve ever seen on mediocre British TV shows. Man, I hated Hitch.

Magic Trip (limited release)
In 1964 Ken Kesey and the Merry Prankster took a road trip across America in a rainbow school bus. Footage shot at the time has now been edited into a documentary. I wish I knew who Ken Kesey and the Merry Prankster were without having to Google them.

Snowtown (limited release)
Telling the true story of serial murders in an Australian suburb, Snowtown is grim, disturbing but excellently made. I think it is a brilliant film, but wouldn’t pick it for a fun film on a Friday night.

Special Forces (limited release)
Diane Kruger stars as a French journalist in Afghanistan who is kidnapped by the Taliban.

Welcome to the Rileys (limited release)
As strategic release for this indie film trying to ride on Twilight‘s coattails. When you’re done watching Kristen Stewart marry a vampire why not watch her play a prostitute being saved by James Gandolfini?